OK I admit it. I can't say the word fiancé. I don't know why, it just sounds so, well, weird when it comes rolling off my tongue. 'We're engaged', fine. 'I'm getting married', fine. But fiancé? I start to get a cold sweat.
So I still call Pete my boyfriend. Even though we live together, have a joint bank account, are getting married and are talking about buying a flat. It's not like I'm commitment-phobic. Why can't I say the 'F' word?
In the interests of being a good fiancée (annoyingly he has no problem with the word) I've been trying to ease myself in gently. First with people I don't know in the context of us getting married. 'Yes, we're getting married in Oxford. Why? Oh well my fiancé went to uni there so we're using his college chapel.'
So far so good. Next, introductions to people who don't know him 'Have you met Pete, my fiancé?' Hmm, a little internal cringe - is it just me that feels like it sounds just a little bit smug?
I'm working up to using it with my friends and work colleagues as in: 'Oh yes I'm just meeting my fiancé for dinner...' But to be honest I think I'll just have to stick to boyfriend, until.... he's my husband. Now there's a whole new word to get my head around.