The time has come for me to say cheerio - it's time for me to go get married. I've been Miss McCorquodale for 29 years and it's been brilliant, but I think being Mrs Townsend is going to trump it a hundred times over.
So, things I need to tell you before I sign off:
1) People might tell you your crazy when you're shouting and bawling about something that has gone wrong, but don't listen to them if they say you're a nutcase. It's your wedding day and they don't understand. So there. Shout and bawl all you like.
2) Don't be bullied. I organised my wedding in ten months, during which various companies told me I'd never get a florist/venue/dress because the time span was too short. But I've got all of them. Easily. People just try to frighten you into spending your budget on them. Especially at wedding fayres. But strong girls.
3) Go with the flow on your hen do. Seriously. On mine (in Stirling, so bloody awesome) I ended up drinking Smirnoff Ice at 11.30am in a bingo hall, kissing nine boys called Simon and busking (I made £7 on one song though - not so bad). But getting over the slight embarrassment early meant I had an awesome time.
4) Don't let the stress kill you. If Kate Middleton can handle it, so can you.
5) If you want to lose weight/get toned do it asap. The last thing you need in the final month before the wedding is to be on a crash diet. Personally, Power Plates three to four times a week and avoiding carbs have got me into the kind of shape I wanted.
6) When it comes to hair, listen to the professionals. Without Foster at Richard Ward Salon and Metrospa, I'd be in serious trouble (repeat to self "backcombing your hair to oblivion is NOT bridal").
7) Your fiance is awesome - don't forget it (easy to do when wedding stress descends).
8) You're awesome too and will be a super hot bride.
Okay, that's it. See you on the other side...