Gift List Etiquette

Gift List Etiquette
Rex Features

Looking for help with your gift-list dilemmas? Read on for all the advice you need...

My aunt thinks it's rude to include details of our gift list with our wedding invitations. Is she right?

A small card that politely mentions where you have a gift list, should guests feel like they like to use it, is often welcome. Just be sure to have a list that includes items to suit all budgets or that suggests guests can club together to buy bigger items, so you don't appear greedy. Also avoid having frivolous items. Even if you and your fiancé live together, guests usually like to think they're helping newlyweds establish a home, so traditional items like bed linen are good choices. But that doesn't mean you have to keep them! Many registries, including The Wedding Shop (020 7838 1188; and Nearly Married (0845 257 8529; let you spend the money contributed to your list on other things.

Store vouchers seem impersonal. What can we do to show guests we're not going to blow the lot in the fashion department?...

Remember that most of your guests will be content to buy what you've said you want. The point of gift lists and vouchers is that they make the whole process easier for your guests. When you send out your invitations, write a short note explaining that you would appreciate vouchers from a particular store as a gift because you are saving towards a certain item or items for your home. After the wedding, when you have bought the item you were saving for, why not invite family and friends round so they can have a look. Alternatively, email a thank-you message with a photo of the gift attached. This way, your guests will be able to see where their money has gone.



  • Times are changing and etiquette when your aunt got married will have changed dramatically. The majority of your guests will be friends of your age and so understand the current situation. The advice above is spot-on - offer a range of prices, and some traditional and non-traditional gifts so guests have some freedom to choose, but you are not lumbered with lots of stuff you don't need. An independent online gift list organiser will make it easy to set-up, and give you freedom to be creative. Whatever they bought you, guests will really appreciate a Thank You after the wedding, so make sure you take note of everything in the exciting post-honeymoon frenzy of unwrapping.

    • Niki {Wedding Notebook}
    • 07 December 2011
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