You've read all the advice on how to write a father of the bride/best man's/maid of honour's speech, but have you thought about what not to include in a wedding speech? No matter what category of speech you're making, there are some things that are a total faux pas for all. So, get your carefully crafted speech to hand, find a red pen, and read our advice on what not to include in a wedding speech.
1. Do not use profanity
There will no doubt be small (and sensitive) ears in the audience, so be sure to avoid excessive and extreme bad language.
2. Do not recall drunken nights together
Unless there's a very good story involved, endless tales of inebriated antics get boring pretty quickly.
3. Do not include any sexual anecdotes
We find the 'Grandma Rule' particularly helpful here: if you wouldn't be happy for your grandmother to hear that particular story about you, then back to the speech-writing drawing board you must go.
4. Avoid name-calling or any derogatory nicknames
If you're a father-of-the-bride, childhood terms of endearment are totally fine. The same applies for best men who remember silly school nicknames. Aliases acquired from misdemeaners with partners past? Not so much.
5. Do not speak ill of the family
An obvious one that needs little explanation.
6. Avoid racist remarks and jokes
Again: need we say more?
7. Refrain from long-winded stories that have no point
A beginning with a few quick anecdotes, a middle with one brilliant story, and a meaningful ending is enough. Also, if you do one thing, be sure to avoid the wedding speech horror-of-horrors: the open mike night.
8. Keep focus and aim not to blabber
Finding the perfect length for your wedding speech is one of the trickiest aspects to nail down. If you get bored writing it, or even reading it back, it's time to cut, cut, cut. Stick to a handful of brilliantly-chosen stories rather than rambling on This Is Your Life-style.
9. Never mention any anecdotes of the couple arguing
Talk about putting a dampner on a couple's wedding day...
10. Try not to include incredibly embarrassing moments
A few well-chosen squirm-inducing stories are, of course, encouraged, but anything truly defamatory should stay with you till the grave.